#metoo #believeSurvivor

In the light of #metoo movement trending on social media, I have found few people wondering and counter questioning survivor’s story just because they took years to come out or because they belong to Bollywood. As a person who dreams of society where gender equality exists, I am very hurt by such comments. I agree and realize that everyone is entitled to have and express their opinion; however I am trying to share few things here in hope that after reading, they could see what they are missing. Something is wrong with their opinion and it needs to be corrected by people like us, if we could change even one person’s mindset it’s one more step toward our dream society.

#metoo is not gender specific, this can happen to any gender and we need to listen to the stories of victim. I am sad that we live in a society where making it listen to victims without dismissing their story is a task, taking actions against abusers is next step. Sexual harassment is gruesome crime and leaves scars on the person for life. At this time, it is important for us to believe them and try to make it even for them, they have suffered enough, we should not add to their misery by asking questions like why they are coming out after 10-20 years or there must be something they are trying to get out of this. It could be true in few of the cases, some people may do such things for fame but all don’t. We, as society, should be focusing on what happened and if it is right or wrong instead of giving importance to things like when it happened, in which industry it happened or what’s hidden agenda of victim.

If you people are wondering that why so long? We live in patriarchal society where a women voice has been suppressed for years. Even in 21st century, there is group of people trying to dismiss victims, imagine how it must have been for them to talk 20 years before. Wasn’t it difficult? Through Social media and #metoo movement, they now have a platform to talk and seeing other victims talk, they are getting courage to do so. They have a hope that society is changed and people will finally listen to them. Imagine you are partying with your friends on Friday night, one person tells how his boss is making his life hell or tells about some travel experience, and others join discussion sharing similar experiences, right? It is as simple as that, think of #metoo also as – just a group of people sharing their experiences now in a large group. This should answer why they all are coming now and at once. Is it too difficult to listen to them and taking actions or starting investigation accordingly to find truth instead of saying – ‘Behti ganga me hat dho rahe hai ye log’? Or ‘this happens in Bollywood’. Yes it happens not only in Bollywood but in all industries; it happens everywhere there is group of people living together, not just workplace, this happens even at ‘Home’. We should say this happens, we should say this happened and this should not happen. If Sexual harassment happens to anyone, at any-time or anywhere, it is and was and will be wrong.

Again I want to emphasize, I am sharing this with you all in a hope to make you see what’s important at this moment. It had been difficult in India to talk about something remotely close to sex, be it sex education or sexual orientation or sexual harassment. I really believe we are moving toward society where we are sensitive enough to identify that it is OK to talk about sex. By decriminalizing section 377 recently we have moved one step further. I expect same with #metoo movement, If not new laws are made to prevent sexual harassment or to take strict actions against rapists and harassers, at least this should change mindset of people who still don’t seem to understand what’s right and what’s wrong and the concept of consent.

Also sharing below image to understand what’s considered as Sexual Harassment. Let’s be aware of this so that such things will not happen to – us or to others or by us unintentionally. Let’s make our workplace safer!